


Eviction Notice

by RipleyD



Series: Cursed Thasmin Things [6]
Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/F, Worms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-28
Updated: 2020-01-28
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:13:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22446973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RipleyD/pseuds/RipleyD
Summary: In which the Doctor stares at Yaz's butthole.
Series: Cursed Thasmin Things [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1218903
Comments: 11
Kudos: 6





	Eviction Notice

**Author's Note:**

> My friends (specifically Amy, Gee, Charlie and Millie) eat ass worms.

Yaz had been subconsciously scratching her bumhole through her jeans. It was the seventh time today that the Doctor had witnessed it! Something was up, but it was as clear as day that Yaz didn't want to say anything.

"Yaz, I think it's time for a house inspection!"

"A what? Why on earth are we going for a house inspection?"

"Oh, _you're_ not going to the inspection. I am!" The Doctor's cheerful smile didn't ease Yaz's suspicion.

"Okay, then where is it?"

The Doctor didn't verbally respond. She merely pushed Yaz to the ground, front to the floor and ass in the air.

"You've obviously got a few uninvited guests, Yaz. I'm just going to help with the eviction process!"

"Doctor, what the fuck are you doing?!" screeched Yaz as she scrambled to get up.

The Time Lady held Yaz's back firmly down against the ground with one hand while the other made quick work of the button and fly of the jeans.

" _Worms_ , Yaz! I can tell you're keeping them! And while I'm all for keeping _exotic_ pets, they can't be comfortable. You've scratched your bum like ten times today."

"Have not!" Yaz protested, but paused and sighed. "Fine, maybe I have, but it definitely wasn't ten times!"

The Doctor grinned when she finally pulled down Yaz's jeans. There was already an eager worm peeking out from the tight sphincter.

"Why hello there, little friend. You're a little far from home, aren't you? You've taken up residence in my friend's chocolate press, and in my eyes that's a capital offence. I hereby sentence you to death, little worm. Your jail shall be my intestinal tract."

"Jesus fucking Christ, Doctor what the fuck WHAT THE FUCK?!"

The Doctor grabbed the worm by the head and pulled it out ever so slowly until it popped free. Yaz squealed at the sensation, tickly and incredibly uncomfortable.

"God, I love a free snack," The Doctor said, licking her lips before dangling the wriggling creature above her open mouth.

Yaz managed to turn around just as the blonde freak actually, _genuinely_ , ate the worm. The noise was disgusting - Yaz would never forget the sound of the sloppy chewing and the delighted hums coming from the Doctor. She was ready to throw up.

The Doctor grinned once she swallowed the worm and glanced down at her companion, still on the ground with her bare ass in the air.

"Time to kick out a few more wormies! The only thing allowed to squat there is my Bad Dragon ( **#notspons** ) alien tentacle strap!"

The Doctor continued her hunt for the remaining worms. She even went as far as sticking her tongue straight into the poop chute like an anteater, but like… for asses.

Yaz just had to stay there and take it. She was currently astral projecting into an alternate universe in which she had never met the Time Lady, living life as a humble Russian old lady farming potatoes.

How long had it been since the Doctor underwent the 'inspection'? Who knows? The Time Lady finally slurped up the last worm and smiled before patting Yaz's caboose like that meme of the car salesman.

"Aaaand she's empty," The Doctor said as she stood up, using her nail to pick out the stringy worm fibres from between her teeth. "You're welcome, Yaz. That'll be £30."

"Huh? Excuse me? You're asking me for money when I didn't even ask you to do this? Fuck this, I'm out. See you in an alternate timeline, Doctor. Come find me when you've stopped being fucking nasty."

Yaz got up in a huff and pulled her jeans up, glaring at the alien as she did so.

"See you 'round, Yaz," The Doctor said wistfully as she watched the young woman stomp out of the TARDIS. "If she'd asked nicely I would have given her a payment plan…"


End file.
